The Story…
I’ve had a few people aske me recently about the title to my blog- how I came up with it and what it means. To start, I should give you the full title:
“fighting to forget… surrendering to remember”
For those of you who know me, you know I’ve seen a lot of sewer-worthy stuff for my relatively short life and you also know the pain and hurt I’ve had to deal with in the last few years. This is where the “fighting to forget” part of the title comes in. I didn’t know what to call it at first, but as I was sitting in front of the computer, my mind completely blank, it was almost as if an audible voice spoke that phrase into my heart. It wasn’t until later, when reading my Bible, that I understoof why God gave that phrase to me:
Not that I have already obtained all of this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead.
Phillippians 3:12-13 NIV
I have a past that I need to let go of. I still have bad habits and thought processes from before I learned to lean on Christ that crop up all too frequently. They are things I know are hindering the growth of my faith and are holding back my relationship with the Father. If I were to let go (“forget”) about these things, I could have so much more life! There are also things that have happened to me, that if I allowed myself to forget instead of holding on to, I would be able to remove a fair amount of bitterness that still dwells in my life.
The above concept is something that I need to do for the sake of my own spiritual growth, but I also nee dot be willing to put that aside if the Lord were to ask it of me- which He does on a regular basis- often several times a day! This is where the second half of the title comes in-
“surrendering to remember”
The passage that most directly correlates with this directive is I Corinthians 9:19-23, but most notable verse 22b:
“I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some”
This creates a very fine line that I must walk (see “Walking the Fine Line” below). I needn’t worry about it, though, because God has never lead me astray. He created the path and put my feet upon it.
The reality is that, in my own personal life, I need to not dwell on my past and need to boldly move forward into this new life I have been handed. Yet, I also need to be willing to surrender to the memories when someone needs to hear them. I can’t tell you how often I’ve heard someone say how good it is to know that someone else had been there. It feels good to know for my own benefit that my pain and the struggles that I have been through to overcome them allow another individual a measure of peace and hope for themselves and where they are at in their own struggles.
I’ve been there- I’ve made those mistakes and I AM NOT PERFECT!!! But I do know what has worked for me and I can offer those things as a step-up for others to find their own means to
“fight to forget and surrender to remember”
*the above was adapted from a letter I wrote to my girls’ group
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