Music and Emotion…
So, I’ve discovered the wide wonderful world of last.fm and am LOVING it! But that’s not really relevant to this blog…
Occassionally I realize just how much my musical listening habits are just extensions of my emotion- or maybe they are intertwined? It seems that my emotions make me think of/crave songs and, on the flip side, sometimes songs are securely tied to making me feel/remember things.
Okay- I guess last.fm does relate to this post, because it was while listening to a song off my playlist that I started to have a very intense flashback tied to a very intense scene and a veritable emotional roller coaster- sorrow, mourning, frustration, anger, happiness, loss, mirth, and hope.
I was listening to “Home” by Michael Buble and not two lines into the song I burst into tears (it’s a good thing that I hide in the corner to avoid customers when at Caribou anyway). It is a song that brings to mind the boys I have lost to this war. I have several friends that will never again come home, or even now that they are home are not the men who left. Now, don’t get me wrong- they all believed in what they did and I believe in them- so this is definitely NOT and anti-war sentiment. But the one that really jumped out in my memory was that of a man I went to high school at CCS with- Cpl. Andrew Kemple. He passed February 12, 2006 in Tikrit when he was shot in the neck during an attack on his humvee.
I hadn’t seen him in years before I heard the news that he had been KIA. I broke down into a pathetic pile of sobbing mess when I found out. He had been a friend for me when I had needed him most. I had been thinking about trying to find him again for a few months prior (lesson to those of you who have lost touch with a good friend- don’t put off finding them- you never know when it’s going to be too late). I wanted to go to his funeral so badly- but I couldn’t bring myself to do that, so I went to just the reviewal. I don’t do well at funerals- and I found out later that I REALLY wouldn’t have done well at his. After his actual funeral had taken place I was Nick’s house when my dad called to make sure I wasn’t in jail- which I thought was very odd, but then he told me to turn on the TV- and I almost threw it against the wall I was so angry. You see, my friend, Drew, who worked hard to straighten out his life and then lived it being a friend to others, and gave it for something he believed in. My friend, Drew, who was the pale red-head with the always poorly timed joke who walked into school every morning singing “Sex and Candy” by Marcy’s Playground, the one I gave a bloody lip from an icy snowball, the one who was always there with a hug and a kiss on the cheek and an “it’s going to be okay”, that Drew was the very same that a group calling themselves Christians protested his funeral!!! They said that the very God he loved had killed him because of America’s stand on homosexuality!!! I was livid!
These people claim to be Christians- but they couldn’t even let a mother grieve for the loss of her son in peace! The Bible tells us “Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.” Hebrews 12:14. But apparently according to them you can listen to some parts of the Bible and dismiss others. Retarded.
Thankfully, for my sanity, at least, a group calling themselves Patriot Guard Riders have begun showing up at military funerals with the sole purpose of keeping the protesters at bay- I’ve only heard a bit about them, but the couple clips I’ve seen have been of hell’s angel-ish type burly men on motorcycles. Aparantly the followers of Rev. Phelps (yes- it’s a pastor leading these horrible people) only want to bring their “message” when it’s convenient and will give them the most media coverage with the least amount of work- because I haven’t heard of them being at any funeral when the Patriot Guard Riders are present.
Another note- there was supposed to be legislation introduced to make it illegal to protest within a vertain distance of a funeral. I hope and pray to God that it passed, but since this faded out of the media hype so long ago, I don’t know if it did and have been unable to find anything about it- does anyone know the status of it? I would be most grateful if anyone knew off-hand or could show and/or tell me how to navigate the impossible search engine our state calls public-resources. Anyone?
All I know is that I still break down every time I hear certain songs because of the empty spot at bonfires. I haven’t had a snowball fight in years. And I can’t sing Marcy’s Playground without smiling. I also now cry every time I hear of another soldier’s funeral- because I know what their friends and family are going through- but at least they are able to lay their sons and dughters to rest with respect. I also have a weak spot for the lone soldier in a bar- the one that is surrounded by friends, but he’s still on the battle field. I just want to say to them (or you- if you are reading this):
You are my hero. There are more of us who believe in you than you know. Don’t let anyone tell you that you can’t be a soldier anymore- we need you here as well. And, most of all,
I UNDERSTAND…
The Star still has a couple of articals archived if you would like to read more about this amazing man or what happened -
http://www.startribune.com/world/11618001.html – More about him
http://www.startribune.com/politics/11758591.html – About the stupidity
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